Who would have thought that I would have waited 14 weeks to
blog again about this pregnancy? In
some ways my quietness is a bit of a backlash to being so public last
time. But, the real reason was that I
had a new job.
As much as I like what Sheryl Sandberg has to say with Lean
In, there’s also reality. After the
friend and colleague who hired me at my new job was let go, I felt a bit
vulnerable. I waited until the 13 week
mark before I told them, and I have to say it went well. In fact I almost wished I had told them
earlier because it might have made the first trimester more bearable.
That’s another reason I didn’t write. I didn’t want to sound ungrateful. I remember being part of the infertility
community and reading the complaints from the newly pregnant. I longed to have morning sickness. Well, I’ve had it and it is overrated. For me it wasn’t morning sickness, it was
all-day misery. I questioned the
wisdom of this last round of treatment—did I really think I was up for another
pregnancy?
And, if I’m really being honest, it has taken me this long
to feel comfortable about having twins.
Being an only child, having more than one was always a stretch for
me. Did I ever think I’d be the mother
of three? Not in my wildest dreams. How did we end up with twins? We put in two “perfect embryos”. You have to understand the math and logic
behind IVF. As I talked about in my
previous blog, the frozen embryo process is far from perfect. We had four embryos frozen and only two
survived.
Even with the phenomenal fresh success rate our clinic has,
their frozen success rate is average.
You have a 50% chance that you will be successful…thus one out of two
should survive. The likelihood of twins
is 30%, which meant we had a 15% chance of having twins. And, if you do have twins, almost 30% don’t
make it past the first trimester. This
was my experience last time when I lost F’s twin at 11 weeks.
But, here I am.
Twenty weeks pregnant with twins.
And, I’m starting to feel normal again.
I’ve returned to working out and have more energy to hang with Mr.
F. I’m keeping an eye on my blood
pressure and hoping that the preeclampsia will stay away and I’ll make it full
term with these little ones.
And, now I know why I have two…. I’m blessed with the
unmatched pair, we have a boy and a girl on the way! I was all prepared to have an all-male hockey
dynasty, but now I may have a little Cammie Granato too!
Thanks again for all the love and support along the way….
