In theory, this is my last day being pregnant-- 39 weeks and 2 days. Given some of the complications of this pregnancy, we are opting to induce tomorrow. It wasn't an easy decision as my preference would have been to let nature take its course and a May baby sounded great.
Instead, in the middle of the royal hubbub tomorrow, we'll be at the hospital hoping for a labor that comes easily and being able to avoid a c-section. I wish I was able to at this point write the heartfelt letter I'd like to about this journey, but that's going to have to wait until I have my full vision back.
My last paragraph is really a tribute to all the gals [and guys] I know who are still struggling to complete their journeys--whether they are still trying to conceive, waiting for adoption or making the decision to be childfree. This week is National Infertility Awareness Week. Infertility is not a glamorous disease--it's not life threatening, so it is hard to raise support and money for it. It is, however, life debilitating-- lots of tears, depression and general malaise. Often, there are very painful losses involved. If you know someone who is struggling, lend them some support or direct them to www.resolve.org. I can't say enough about how wonderful the online community is about helping each other make it through this tough time.
Thank you all for sharing this journey with me and for following my story. We couldn't have done it without you.
Right now, I want a double vodka martini. At least then, I might have an explanation for why I have been seeing two of everything for the last 72 hours.
It all started on Thursday when I was feeling some sinus pressure. I didn't think much of it, except that it was annoying. Then, on Friday, I felt off--a little lightheaded and concerned enough that I had Clay drive me to the doctor. Then, late on Friday night, I looked toward the kitchen and saw two Clays....now if one wasn't enough to handle! I didn't think too much about it and assumed I'd wake up in the morning with the world looking alright.
That wasn't the case. Since Saturday, my vision has been a mess. I am seeing double when I look straight ahead. I had finally resigned myself to bed rest [and had survived the week thanks to Netflix streaming and a bunch of hockey playoffs], but now looking at any type of screen is a challenge. For the first couple of days I could use the computer with ease, but now I have to use my peripheral vision to type.
And, yes, I have called the doctors. My ob says as long as my blood pressure is in check--it just appears to be another type of swelling. I called the eye doctor this morning--he didn't want to see me. He said that tired, hormones, blood sugar, blood pressure, etc... were probably having an effect. None of it is very satisfying answers.
I'll be the first to admit that I don't deal with a health crisis very well. My brain always goes to the worst--what if this doesn't reverse? However, I think that is the challenge in front of me at the moment. I need to just have some peace about this and try to stick with the go forward plan, which is to have this baby in due time and have faith that everything will work itself out.
Meanwhile, I still feel incredibly lucky for all the friends and family I have. Hopefully, I don't forget anybody...but the last week you continue to amaze me with your kindness. LF for keeping me company. JS for helping me finish organizing the nursery. KC for both a lovely dinner and then going to BBB for those extras you thought the nursery needed. NK for the much needed In n Out fix plus babysitting me. KM for sending me a box of clothes, so that I don't freak out about not having the right clothes for #3 to wear. Mom for everything..shopping, fixing Easter dinner, more grocery shopping and more dinner fixing.
Since the Easter Bunny forgot to bring me #3, I can only hope he is on his way soon.
My Type A personality finally got the best of me. Today was my last day of work, so I was fast and furiously trying to get everything done before I went to my weekly doctor's visit. First we did the weekly heartrate monitoring and that was great, #3 is definitely very active.
Then, we went and took my blood pressure--it hit an all-time high of 152/100. The issue with this is that it can be a sign of pre-eclampsia, which is a very dangerous condition for pregnant women. Other signs include swelling...and anybody who has been around me for the last couple of weeks have seen my huge feet and ankles [maybe I'll share a picture]. I am still waiting to hear about lab results--but I am assuming no news is good news. The doctor was ready to send me to the hospital for monitoring, but she wanted to take my blood pressure a second time after I was on my side for awhile. The good news is that twenty minutes later it was down to 130/84. But, it is clear that I need to take it easy.
So, I am now on house arrest...me, the couch and the Zamboni for the next couple of weeks. I am bummed in the sense that I was looking forward to having a couple weeks to finish getting the house ready--"nesting". But, I know that all that matters at this moment in time is keeping #3 safe.
My due date is May 4th and that is starting to look suspect. My other stats today... I was 2-3cm dilated and already 50% effaced, so I do believe that Clay and I need to be ready for anything. And, I think we are.
Actually they were March showers, but it took awhile to get all the pieces together for this post. I had two magnificent baby showers--we opted to split them up to be more intimate. I apologize in advance if someone felt slighted.
I still find it hard to believe that I actually had a baby shower. A day doesn't go by [even with my swollen feet and expanding belly] when I don't take a deep breath and give thanks for being just weeks away from the new arrival.
No more words today...just pictures.
My friend Jenn made 24 individual block cakes--filled with coconut cream frosting. She cut all the lettering, etc by hand. The favors were herbs with the tag, "Grow with the Fiske Family".
Jenn and I
Julie, co-hostess, and shower giver extraordinaire
There's a great bib on the table, it says "Star of Mommy's Blog". The favors were Nancy's homemade truffles in these cute baby bottle boxes.
My mom and the future Aunt Nancy who threw a lovely brunch.
My mother-in-law and sister-in-law flew in from Minnesota.
I could post so many more pictures. Julie got some terrific invitations and decorations from serendipitydesignco.com [they can be found on Etsy]. They were baby bottle Bellinis [which I heard were delicious]. The first venue was at a terrific new wine bar in Los Gatos called Enoteca La Storia. There were so many beautiful, cute and thoughtful gifts.